Top Ten Reasons Why Canada can not join USA in the War on Iraq:
10. We have no way of getting there.
9. We are too busy at home with the Maple Syrup Season.
8. Iraqis don't drink Labatts beer.
7. Saddam's name pronounced backwards is "Mad Ass". We'll stay away
6. There is only limited potential for sales of Canadian Bacon in Iraq after the war.
5. Celine Dion can't sing to the troops because she has a contract in Las Vegas.
4. The Rivers in Iraq are too shallow for our War Canoes.
3. Lousy hockey in Iraq at this time of year
2. Our army is needed at home in case of another snow storm in Toronto.
1. Our Sea King Helicopter in need of repairs - it has cracks in it.